There are times I feel so lost and just alone.
Its been said you can always go home,
But that’s not always an option.
Sometimes there is not a home to run back to,
So you just gotta make it work.
I get tired of making it work exhausted of trying,
Only to repeat the same mistakes time after time.
My head space has been a mess,
Seems to me that there are times I’m so invisible,
that I can’t even find myself much less be acknowledged by anyone else.
I am 37 I’m far from confused about who I am at this point but it seems to me that the same people
Always come around.
When I was 20 people in their 40s is who I dated.
Now I’m nearing 40 and now whom do I find?
Is it that hard to find someone who doesn’t live on their phone?
Or who doesn’t prefer to cuddle their pet over me.
I’m ok If you need meds but can you just take them without me asking you to.
Care about my day
The man in the moon keeps his gaze upon me,
There is not an angle from which he cannot see,
He watches from the highest places,
Though in the shadows he leaves traces,
I cannot get a glimpse of him,
But he keeps me safe again and again.
She got it all twisted
And took me the wrong way,
These days you have to watch you say.
You can’t be supportive or nice,
Or your a creeper,
Seems like people prefer,
Well that’s not me,
I smile say how are you?
I am warm to others.
I refuse to be a sarcastic butt munch,
To make you more comfortable with social interaction.
Recently I found myself wondering what the point of stressing out over things is.
Seems to me the outcome is the same if worry or not and yet I stress.
I hate it when people say relax as if that calms me,
It’s been said that there are pills that can be taken to “Reduce My Anxiety”.
I’m not going to pop a pill so I can be numb to the fact that the world we live in is in a super bad place right now.
Its a stressful time no matter who you are,
Are we going to drug the whole world to get peace and harmony?
I don’t think so.
In the New Year I am hoping to cut away all things that bring me down.
Life is tricky enough without the added B.S
Of people who drag you down.
If you are happy with yourself that’s what matters.
If you’re surrounded by people who say things
“That shirt doesn’t go with those shoes ”
“Your face is looking fat”
Then it’s time to Say
No More Negativity!
Be happy in your own Skin.
If your friends don’t like the skin you’re in then cut them loose.
That’s my plan for the New Year!
Personally I don’t prefer this time of the year. I think that people that you never see or rarely talk to decide to come out of the woodwork around October. And then checking on you all the way around about Thanksgiving. Then December they’re like oh and this is what I want for Christmas. They linger till new year then fade out and the cycle begins again.
I’m not saying this is the intention of everyone,
But i think that being there consistently is what counts.